


mention our ghosts, our knotted spines

by frapucinno



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Exes, Getting Back Together, M/M, Minor Violence, Overwatch AU, as in they're overwatch agents, cheesy shit
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-27
Updated: 2018-11-27
Packaged: 2019-08-29 22:16:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 13,776
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16752469
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/frapucinno/pseuds/frapucinno
Summary: When Seungcheol initiates an Overwatch recall, Jihoon has to face the emotions and memories that he had tried so hard to keep at bay for the past five years.





	mention our ghosts, our knotted spines

**Author's Note:**

> hi i'm back with another niche au that no one really asked for!!!  
> you don't have to be familiar with overwatch's lore to read this, but just in case:  
>   
> \- omnics/omnic crisis: omnics are basically robots/artificial intelligence built by humans to serve them and the economy. the omnic crisis was a war between self-aware omnics and humanity.  
> \- overwatch: an organization founded by the united nations to help end the omnic crisis, which was then turned into a peacekeeping force. after the death of its two leaders and a string of scandals, the united nations shut it down.  
> \- blackwatch: overwatch's covert ops division.  
> \- petras act: a law put into place by the united nations after overwatch's disbandment that deems any and all overwatch activity that could be done by former agents illegal and punishable by prosecution.  
> \- talon: a terrorist organization that serves as the main antagonistic faction in overwatch's narrative.  
> 
> 
> the parts in brackets ( like this ) are flashbacks.  
> (title taken from 'mention we loved, know it was enough to linger' by p.d. / lostcap on tumblr.)

“Hey, hyung?”

“I’m busy,” Jihoon replies from where he’s situated by the boosters of Chan’s mech -- Saja, they call her, made out of hunks of metal that Jihoon had salvaged from different broken mechs, thrown together to become this coppery fighting machine. She’s a little bit banged up right now from the fight they had last night, but it’s nothing Jihoon couldn’t fix.

“Hyung,” Chan calls out again. “I think, uh, this is important. Really important. You might want to see this.”

Jihoon rolls his eyes and pushes himself up. “How important could this be?” He walks around Saja and finds Chan frozen, mouth parted, staring at the large screen in front of him. It illuminates the planes of his face in a light blue glow. He turns to look at Jihoon, eyes wide as he points insistently towards the screen.

“What is it?” Jihoon raises an eyebrow and stands beside Chan. The words on the screen are white and rigid, and it took Jihoon at least five re-reads to make sure he wasn’t imagining things:

**OVERWATCH RECALL INITIATED.**

**ANSWER?**

**YES   /   NO**

////

 

(   The day the PETRAS Act was put into place was full of emotions from opposite ends of the spectrum. There’s victory, of course, from those who were vehemently opposed of the organization. Anger, grief, loss, relief; and those who were stuck in between.

Seungcheol was probably the one who fought the hardest for Overwatch, but there was nothing they could do, not with the divulgence of Blackwatch to the public, and certainly not without Minhyun and Jonghyun.

Jihoon had stood by Seungcheol then, watching as the gates of their headquarters were shut for good.   )

 

////

“Seungcheol’s out of his goddamn mind,” murmurs Jihoon as he lugs his suitcase behind him. The ground is wet and cold due to a short-lived storm that came just minutes after they landed. Mud had begun to stick to the soles of Jihoon’s boots and he’s going to suffer while cleaning them later.

Jihoon had been antsy the entire flight and he still is. He can’t be blamed -- it’s been five years since he stepped foot inside the Hakone Watchpoint and it’s been five years since he saw Seungcheol and the rest. He doesn’t know what Seungcheol wants and was more than hesitant to answer the recall at first, but after three days of Chan’s endless persuasion, he relents, decides to fly all the way to Hakone to hear Seungcheol out.

He’s not sure how he’s going to react when he sees Seungcheol again, or the rest… If they even decide to come, that is. The years have been hard for all former agents ever since Overwatch’s disbandment. Some, like Jeonghan and Mingyu, are still very much dedicated to helping those in need while others became mercenaries. Most decide to lay low, not wanting to draw attention to themselves.

Jihoon belongs in that last category. He’s always been the type who prefers being in the sidelines.

“Would you calm down?” Chan says from beside him, carrying his own suitcase. He grabs Jihoon’s fidgety hand to stop him from scratching into the fleshy part of his palm, a nervous tick that he had developed within the past few months. “This is going to be so cool.”

Jihoon snorts. “It’s not cool. Overwatch was shut down for a reason.”

“And a reform was initiated for a reason too,” Chan points out.

“It better be a damn good one. I can’t believe I let you talk me into letting you come. We’re risking prosecution here. If the South Korean government finds out, they’re going to kick you off MEKA.”

“And yet here we are, making our way to the Watchpoint,” Chan says like it isn’t obvious, like they’re not going to get thrown in prison if they’re found out. He gives Jihoon a lopsided grin, eyes sparkling with excitement. “What does Overwatch want with you anyway, hyung?”

“I don’t know,” Jihoon replies. He isn’t lying -- well, maybe he has an inkling of what’s expected of him, but he’s not a hundred percent sure yet. Maybe Seungcheol just wants to throw a reunion dinner or something. He’s always one for the dramatics.

“I wonder what happened. It must be something big if a recall was initiated, right? How many agents did you think answered?” Chan prattles, something he does when he gets too excited about something. “Oh! Do you think Yoon Jeonghan’s coming? It would be so cool to meet him. Oh my God, if I meet him I would ex —”

“We’re here,” Jihoon announces, cutting Chan’s gushing short.

Chan comes to a halt behind Jihoon, jaw hanging open as he lifts his head and stares up. “Woah.”

The Hakone Watchpoint takes the shape of an enormous silver temple, built up in the mountains surrounded by forests and rivers, and that’s part of the reason why it was Jihoon’s favourite Watchpoint. There’s a sense of tranquility and safety that the trees provide, hiding them away from the rest of the world. Crooked satellite antennas peek through the greenery, jarring and artificial against the nature around it. The Watchpoint had seen better days -- the metal it’s made out of isn’t as shiny as Jihoon remembers it being and is already beginning to rust; its grand pillars entwined by vines and branches, swallowed by the trees. It’s become a shell of its former shelf, but to Chan who’s seeing it for the first time it must look absolutely grandiose and marvelous.

The doors slide open with a hiss and Choi Seungcheol comes running out, a big grin plastered on his face. He looks older, rougher around the edges, but he’s still the same Seungcheol that Jihoon knows, the same Seungcheol that Jihoon had fought side by side with all those years ago.

“Jihoon-ah,” he calls out. “I’m glad you could make it.” He bends over for a hug but changes his mind the last second and pats Jihoon’s back instead. “It’s been too long.”

Jihoon smiles at him. “It has,” he agrees. The last time Jihoon saw Seungcheol was half a decade ago, just a day after the PETRAS Act was implemented. “It’s good to finally see you again.”

Chan had been standing behind Jihoon the entire time, starstruck, until he probably finally realizes that staring is rude and he approaches Seungcheol with a nervous smile and an extended hand. “Hi. I’m Chan. Lee Chan. It’s very nice to meet you,” he says, before quickly adding, “sir.”

“I know you,” Seungcheol says, shaking Chan’s hand firmly. Jihoon had to bite back his laughter at how nervous Chan looks.

“Y-you do?”

“Of course. Lee Chan aka Dino, the youngest -- and might I say best -- mech pilot that MEKA’s recruited. Your reputation precedes you,” Seungcheol grins. “You’re the reason Busan’s still standing.”

Jihoon snickers when he sees Chan’s ears turn red. “I -- Thank you! But it’s not only me. I’ve gotten great help from great people!”

“I suspect Jihoon here is one of them. How is it like working with him?”

“He’s amazing, sir. He’s always working so hard to improve the mechs and their weaponry,” Chan replies, and Jihoon feels his face heat up despite himself. He was never good at receiving compliments. “My mech got banged up pretty bad one time -- boosters and cannons all gone -- but he managed to fix it in, what? Two days? I don’t think he slept at all that time.”

Seungcheol regards Chan curiously. “Oh? Is that all he does?”

“I mean, he’s a very good mechanic. What --”

This time, Seungcheol turns to Jihoon to ask, “You didn’t tell him?”

Chan’s eyebrows furrow. “Tell me what?”

“Jihoon was the head of Overwatch’s engineering division,” Seungcheol explains, a look on his face that’s a mixture of pride and possibly nostalgia. “Not only that, but he was the one who created the first mech prototype, and also the first person to pilot it. His call sign was Woozi.”

Chan turns to Jihoon with his jaw dropped. “You _what?_ ”

Jihoon brushes him off. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“What do you mean it’s not that big of a deal?” Chan exclaims, waving his hands frantically in the air. “I know you worked in a different government organization before MEKA, but I didn’t know it was fucking _Overwatch_. We’ve been working together for a year and a half and you’ve never bothered to tell me any of this?”

“I didn’t think it was important,” Jihoon shrugs. It’s part of the whole truth. Revealing his past to Chan wasn’t imperative to their jobs, and he wanted people to treat him for who he is now than who he was in the past. He’s Lee Jihoon, the mechanic assigned to Dino and his mech; not Woozi, head of Overwatch’s engineering department. Not anymore.

(The other part is that, frankly, he’s scared of the ramifications that could fall upon him for bearing the organization’s name, for being linked to Overwatch.)

“I can’t believe this. I can’t trust anyone anymore,” Chan says, distressed. “Wait, that’s how it took you literal seconds to find what was wrong with Daniel-hyung’s mech when the others had spent days trying to figure out the issue. You practically invented the damn thing, you know how it works best! You have to tell me all about it later, hyung!”

Jihoon agrees to Chan’s request, if only to make him shut up for a minute. He’s starting to look at Jihoon with the same wide eyed wonder he looks at Seungcheol with, and it’s a bit unnerving. He’s so used to bickering with Chan and treating him like a little brother and he really doesn’t want any of that to change. They’re equals after all, and he hopes Chan would still regard him as such and not put him on some sort of pedestal.

“Am I the only one here?” Jihoon asks Seungcheol. Part of him hopes he’s not, but another part wishes he is.

Seungcheol shakes his head. “Someone else arrived before you.”

“Who?”

“Junhui and, uh,” Seungcheol scratches the back of his ear, looking like he’s mildly uncomfortable.

Jihoon already knows what Seungcheol’s about to say before he even says it. “Soonyoung?”

It’s the first time he’s uttered his name in years, and yet it feels like he had never stopped saying it.

“Yes,” Seungcheol affirms.

Jihoon swallows thickly. “Oh.”

“They’re inside,” Seungcheol says, cocking his head towards the entrance of the Watchpoint. He looks a bit wary and Jihoon doesn’t blame him; he’s one of the the few people in the world who’s aware of all the history shared between him and Soonyoung, was there through the rise and fall.

Maybe Jihoon should have contacted him earlier to ask who else had answered the recall so he could make up some half-assed excuse as to why he couldn’t come in order to avoid all the incoming awkwardness he knows that will happen once he’s face to face with Soonyoung, but Jihoon’s an adult. He can do this.

History is history, after all.

 

////

 

(   The first time Jihoon met Soonyoung was at the Nusa Islands Ecopoint, just southeast of the coast of Bali, Indonesia.

Jihoon was sitting at the open deck, laptop propped up on his knees as he typed away at some report when he heard a yell coming from a few feet away. He squinted against the harsh sunlight and could make out the figure of a man standing on the edge of the cliff in front of him, waving his arms wildly at Jihoon.

 _Watch this!_ he had yelled, voice carried by the winds, before he did a double somersault and dove straight into the cerulean ocean, landing with a huge splash. When he didn’t resurface after a few seconds, Jihoon quickly made his way to the edge of the deck and peeked over the railings.

His head popped out of the water, eyes turned into crescents and bright grin plastered on his face, flashing Jihoon a thumbs up. Jihoon had laughed, incredulous of the guy’s bravery and utter stupidity of having just jumped off a hundred foot tall cliff.   )

 

////

 

The inside of the Watchpoint was just like what Jihoon had thought it would be: untouched, dusty, filled to the brim with memories that Jihoon hadn’t thought about in years. Suddenly everything comes pouring back, like that time Mingyu blew up half the lab because of a miscalculation in whatever experiment he was doing, or when Joshua had set the microwave on fire because he might be a genius at hard-light technology but he’s absolutely inept when it comes to kitchen appliances.

Their footsteps echo off the walls; to be honest, it makes Jihoon a bit sad to see how the Watchpoint that used to bustle with life back in the day is now completely void of it, much like a cemetery. The memories are still there but they’re all ghosts now -- there’s nothing tangible anymore.

Seungcheol leads them to a room that Jihoon remembers used to be their conference room. The doors take a little more pushing to get them open and when they do, a huge cloud of dust flies into the air.

Jihoon takes a step in, looks around, feels his heart struggle against the confines of his ribcage.

Soonyoung sits in the old swivel chair in the centre of the room, head bowed down as he taps away on his tablet. His hair is shorter than the last time Jihoon saw him, the sides of it shaved into an undercut, his bangs falling just a bit above his eyebrows. He looks up and locks eyes with Jihoon, and Jihoon feels his heart break free and crawl up his throat, feels himself stop breathing; wants to look away but couldn’t, and it’s like the whole world has fallen away into nothing; like it’s only the two of them left in the universe.

He looks just as magnificent and heartbreaking as Jihoon remembers, all whispered confessions and warm fingertips; fleeting kisses on foreheads and wandering hands. Something in Jihoon stirs: a feeling he hasn’t felt or even thought about in years, unearthed like centuries old bones from the soil of someone’s backyard.

Soonyoung opens his mouth to say something, but Junhui beat him to it.

“Jihoon! You’re here!” he exclaims, standing up excitedly. Jihoon tears himself away from Soonyoung’s gaze. He faces Junhui, who’s grinning from ear to ear, and Jihoon couldn’t help but smile back. Junhui practically leaps over the table and envelopes him in a bone crushing hug, his face pressed against the soft fabric of Junhui’s jacket, Junhui’s chronal accelerator digging into Jihoon’s chest. Jihoon didn’t even have it in him to fight Junhui off -- he missed Junhui, he really did, -- and awkwardly pats his back.

All the while, Jihoon’s entirely aware that Soonyoung’s watching him; he knows Soonyoung well enough that he can almost always read him like a book -- he’s postured like he wants to say or do something, but he stays silent and still.

Once Junhui releases him, he points an accusatory finger at Seungcheol. “Seungcheol, you bastard, you never told us Jihoon was coming!”

Seungcheol holds up his hands in defense of himself. “He answered the recall three days late. I was already convinced he _wouldn’t_ come.”

“He brought a friend too! Who’s the kid?” Junhui asks, tilting his head towards Chan’s direction.

“I’m Lee Chan,” Chan bows, floundering a bit as all the attention is suddenly directed towards him. “Nice to meet you all!”

“I’m Junhui. He’s Soonyoung. And that’s Minghao,” Jun points to the corner of a room where a person is sitting, and Jihoon wouldn’t have spotted him if Junhui hadn’t pointed him out. Minghao stands, tall and intimidating, but the smile on his face says otherwise. He approaches them and extends a hand towards Jihoon.

Jihoon takes it. Minghao looks familiar, and seconds later it clicks. “You’re Xu Minghao, right? I don’t think we’ve formally met before, but weren’t you the head of the Beijing Watchpoint’s tech division? I’ve heard a lot about you.”

Minghao chuckles, light and airy. “That’s right, I was. It’s nice to have someone recognize me as that. Nowadays I’m known as Junhui and Soonyoung’s babysitter.”

The comment takes Jihoon so aback that he barks out a laugh before quickly covering his mouth with his hand, consciously aware of how loud it sounded in such an empty place. Junhui’s head pops up from behind Minghao’s shoulder looking mildly offended. “Hey!”

Minghao shrugs. “It’s true.”

Junhui pouts. “You’re a brat,” he says, which doesn’t even faze Minghao one bit.

Seungcheol interrupts the squabble before it could escalate. “Since you’ve all been acquainted -- or re-acquainted, I guess -- you all should get some rest. I’m sure you all have questions. We can talk things over tonight. Maybe tomorrow, latest.”

“Who else answered?” Soonyoung asks, the first time he’s spoken since Jihoon’s stepped into the room, and it’s in that moment that Jihoon realizes he had went half a decade without hearing Soonyoung’s voice.

Seungcheol looks like he’s having a small debate with himself as to whether or not he should answer the question. He sighs after a while, says, “I’ve been going back and forth with Jeonghan but… You know how he is.”

Soonyoung nods and rises from his seat. “Well. Update us if anything happens.”

The conversation comes to an end, and before Jihoon could even blink, Junhui had already herded Chan and Minghao out of the conference room to show them around the Watchpoint. Seungcheol lingers back for a while; he opens his mouth to speak but then decides against it, leaving Jihoon alone with Soonyoung.

The silence in the air is as thick and heavy as treacle, and the walls feel like they’re suddenly closing in on him. Whenever Jihoon takes a breath, he feels the dust settling on the bottom of his lungs. His eyes land on anything but Soonyoung.

Soonyoung is the first to break the stillness; it shatters over their heads like a pane of glass. “How have you been?” His voice is quiet, unsure. The shards bury themselves deep into Jihoon’s skin.

“Fine,” comes Jihoon’s response, taught and icy. The coldness in his voice surprises himself. He gathers his nerves and finally looks at Soonyoung; sunshine and longing and heartache personified. His eyes are full of something Jihoon can’t quite decipher.

“Ji,” Soonyoung starts, voice low. Jihoon hasn’t heard that nickname in years. “I’m sorry.”

“Not now, Soonyoung,” Jihoon says. He suddenly feels so, so tired. “I don’t want to hear it.” He turns around to walk away, but not before he catches a glimpse of the hurt that flashes across Soonyoung’s face, and suddenly Jihoon’s heart is breaking all over again.

 

////

 

(   “Why aren’t you asleep yet?”

“I can’t,” Soonyoung replies, not looking up from his desk. “Not until I figure out how to fix this fucking blaster.”

Jihoon walks over to where Soonyoung is seated, peering over his shoulders to watch Soonyoung tinker with parts of his blue and silver blaster. Soonyoung’s hair tickles his nose and he could smell the mint shampoo that Soonyoung uses. “What’s wrong with it?”

“That’s what I’ve been trying to figure out for the past two hours,” Soonyoung grumbles. “It just won’t shoot. It’s like it’s clogged or something, and I’ve tried --”

“You wired it wrongly,” Jihoon interrupts. From what he sees, it’s clear as day that Soonyoung had mixed up the wires. “The black one -- it’s supposed to be attached to the trigger switch, not the blue one.”

Soonyoung quickly fixes his mistake and tests his blaster out. Sure enough, it works. “Are you serious? I spent hours taking this thing apart and putting it back together again only to find out I messed up the wires?”

“This is why you don’t try and fix weapons at three in the morning,” Jihoon chides.

Soonyoung sets his blaster down and turns to look up at Jihoon. His eyes are red rimmed and tired, but he’s smiling. “Lee Jihoon, you fucking genius. God, I could kiss you right now.”

Jihoon doesn’t know if it’s because he himself hasn’t gotten much sleep either, or because he was feeling particularly brave, but he knows that in that moment his brain-to-mouth filter had badly malfunctioned. “Then do it.”

Soonyoung freezes, jaw dropping open in disbelief. “W-What?”

Jihoon feels his face heat up. It’s too late to take it back now. They’ve been dancing around each other for months and Jihoon’s getting tired of waiting. “I said do it. If you want to kiss me, kiss me.”

“I -- Oh, wow. Okay,” Soonyoung stutters, and suddenly he looks like he’s super wide awake. His reaches his hand out as if he’s about to touch Jihoon’s face but stops halfway. “I mean. Are you sure? Do _you_ want to?”

“Put your money where your mouth is, Kwon,” Jihoon grabs Soonyoung’s hand and places it on the back of his neck. Soonyoung tenses up, the move clearly unexpected, but he soon relaxes, fingers playing with the strands of hair at the base of Jihoon’s neck. He nervously smiles, and Jihoon was about to tell him to hurry up before he chickens out when Soonyoung pulls him down and closes the distance between them.

Soonyoung’s lips are a tiny bit chapped, but they’re warm and they taste like the blueberry gummy candies he likes to snack on. The kiss was nothing more than a peck at first, as if they’re still testing the waters. Then Jihoon opens his mouth slightly, allowing Soonyoung to slip his tongue in; he lets out an involuntary whine when Soonyoung runs his tongue over his lips.

Soonyoung’s as red as a tomato when they break apart, and Jihoon never thought Soonyoung would be the type to get so flustered over a kiss.

“Uh, that was great,” he breathes out. “Thanks.”

Jihoon snorts at the complete one eighty change that Soonyoung had gone through -- he would unabashedly flirt with Jihoon and he finds it funny now that he’s the one becoming all awkward and nervous.

It’s endearing, though. Everything he does is.

Jihoon rolls his eyes and pulls Soonyoung back in for another kiss. Jihoon’s pretty sure that the feeling he has in his stomach when their lips meet is akin to the feeling of diving off a hundred foot tall cliff. )

 

////

 

“This place is so cool,” Chan says from where he’s lying on the floor, just a few metres away from Jihoon. He hears Chan shift, propping himself up on his elbows so he could look at Jihoon. “You’re so cool, hyung.”

Jihoon feels the tips of his ears heat up. “I’m not.”

“You are! I can’t believe you were part of Overwatch. How was it, back in the day?”

“The stories you’ve heard are more or less true,” Jihoon picks up his pillow and hugs it close to his body. He had brought it from Busan along with two sleeping mats for Chan and himself. There’s a bed, but the mattress is filthy and dusty due to years of neglect, so they cleaned up the floors and laid down the mats. The room they’re in is the one Jihoon used to stay in whenever he was stationed in the Hakone Watchpoint and it’s so weird to be back after such a long time. It feels both foreign and familiar. “Overwatch was a great organization. Especially during its peak. It’s a shame that everything had to crash so quickly and so roughly.”

“What actually happened? Is the Hwang Minhyun and Kim Jonghyun thing true?”

“Unfortunately,” Jihoon replies, sighing. “I don’t even know what actually happened myself, but things got really tense between them. I think it all started just after Minhyun-hyung became the commanding officer of our covert ops division.”

Chan’s eyes widened. “Blackwatch?”

Jihoon nods. “Blackwatch wasn’t all that bad, you know. Minhyun-hyung was a great person and an even greater leader. I really don’t know how the public came up with those insane theories.” He lets out a sigh and is surprised to hear how tired he sounds. “They weren’t the villains that everyone made them out to be. Blackwatch was made up of good people: Minhyun-hyung, Jieqiong, Soonyoung —”

Chan raises an eyebrow. “The Soonyoung we met just now? He was part of Blackwatch?”

Jihoon nods. Chan considers this for a second before he says, “He doesn’t look like the type who does covert ups.”

Jihoon snorts, squeezing his pillow tighter. “He’s… surprising, to say the least. Just when you think you know him, he does something that’ll make you wonder if everything you’ve learned about him is true or not.”

“You know him pretty well though, right hyung? You two seemed… well…” Chan gestures vaguely in the air.

“Am I supposed to be able to decipher your pantomiming?”

Chan rolls his eyes. “There was… a lot going on in that room. You don’t have to be a genius to be able to figure out that between the two of you lies some pretty heavy history.”

“We’re old friends,” Jihoon replies as nonchalantly at possible, even though it doesn’t sound quite right. He swallows down the lump in his throat.

Chan hums; he doesn’t call out the obvious lie in Jihoon’s words; doesn’t say, _“Well, you and Seungcheol are old friends too, but you don’t treat each other like pieces of broken glass, like you two are remnants of something that used to be whole.”_

_////_

( The door of Jihoon’s lab swings open and slams shut, but Jihoon hardly flinches. He’s too focused on trying to fix the transmitters that somehow malfunctioned during their last mission. If he doesn’t get them working by tonight then they’ll be short of three, and if something urgent comes their way then three of them won’t have any means of communication whatsoever.

Someone clears their throat behind him and Jihoon turns, half expecting it to be Soonyoung, but it’s not. Instead Junhui stands behind him, arms crossed and looking mildly pissed.

Jihoon blinks. “What are you doing here?”

“When were you going to tell me that you and Soonyoung are dating?” Junhui asks.

The question was so unexpected that Jihoon almost falls out of his chair. He stares at Junhui dumbfounded and could only sputter out, “W-what? Where did you get that idea?”

Junhui snorts. “Do you think I’m that stupid? It’s written all over your faces. You both have never looked more sickeningly in love.”

Jihoon gapes at him. It’s no use denying anything now, so he answers weakly, “We were planning on telling you all some time this week but we just… haven’t found the right time.”

Junhui’s expression softens and before Jihoon knows it, he’s hugging him. “Awww! Congratulations!” Junhui coos. “It’s about time! We were about to stage an intervention if you two didn’t get together in the next month.”

Jihoon tries to push him away but Junhui only clings onto him tighter. “Wait, what? An intervention?”

“We’re all sick of you two just pining and not doing anything about it.”

“Were we… that obvious?”

Junhui finally releases him; he looks at Jihoon like he had just asked a stupidly ignorant question. “Uh, yeah? Anyone with a pair of eyes could tell you two are hopelessly in love with each other. You’re telling me you _didn’t_ notice Soonyoung’s constant heart eyes at you?”

Jihoon swallows. “No?”

“Oh my God, you two are so dense. That’s why it took so long,” Junhui says, shaking his head disapprovingly, but there’s a sincere smile on his face. “Congratulations, again. You two make a great couple. If Soonyoung ever hurts you, tell me so I can beat his ass.”

Jihoon laughs. “Thank you, I appreciate the sentiment.”   )

 

////

 

Jihoon is woken up by the sound of something crashing in the halls outside. He sits up and rubs the sleep out of his eyes, momentarily stunned by the fact that he’s not in his room in Busan and for a second he thought he had been kidnapped, until he remembers that he had answered the Overwatch recall and is currently staying in the old Hakone Watchpoint.

There’s another crash outside, this one a bit louder. The clock on Jihoon’s phone reads 2:43 a.m. and Jihoon finds it a bit suspicious that someone is roaming around the Watchpoint this late — it could be Seungcheol or Junhui or Minghao or Soonyoung but there’s also a chance that it isn’t any of them, and from all the years he spent being part of Overwatch, Jihoon knows that if something feels wrong then it most probably is. Working in that industry has instilled in him the principle of ‘it’s better to be safe than sorry’.

Chan is sleeping soundly, cocooned in his blanket; Jihoon decides not to wake him up and quietly walks around him. He had just shut the door close behind him when the door of the room to the opposite right of him opens with a soft squeak of hinges, and out pops Soonyoung’s head.

He looks surprised to see Jihoon but he doesn’t say anything. Jihoon knows that Soonyoung, unlike himself, is a heavy sleeper and could probably sleep through an earthquake so the crashes couldn’t have woken him up, which means that he probably had been awake the whole night. Something in Jihoon’s chest stirs. He chooses to ignore it.

“Did you hear that?” Jihoon mouths at him. Soonyoung nods once before he fully slips out of his room; he’s dressed in a hoodie and sweatpants, nothing too fancy, but Jihoon’s brain betrays him and he thinks to himself, _oh, he’s pretty._ Jihoon swallows thickly, paranoid that Soonyoung had somehow gained telepathic abilities over the last five years, but Soonyoung shows no sign of having read Jihoon’s mind. He stands stiffly by the door with his blaster in hand, charged up and ready to shoot whoever is out there.

Jihoon moves first. He doesn’t need to look back to know that Soonyoung is following him. Even though their steps are light, practically soundless against the floorboards due to their years of training and experience, Jihoon knows exactly where Soonyoung is. He’s behind him, just a little to his left — this is the product of having spent so much time with Soonyoung on and off the field. They’re so in tune with each other’s movements that Junhui had claimed it scared him, and it kind of shocks Jihoon to discover that even after five years of not seeing each other let alone work together, they’re still syncing up perfectly.

Jihoon hears a shuffle just across the hall. In normal circumstances, he probably wouldn’t have caught onto it, but in a place so quiet and still it’s practically a gunshot. He gestures to Soonyoung to ask for back up before he rounds the corner to come face to face with a masked figure. There was a split second where all of them were too stunned to move before the masked man whips out his blaster and shoots a beam of red laser at Jihoon, missing his ear by inches.

Soonyoung fires back, searing the floor just beside the man’s feet, but he must have expected it because in the next second the entire hall was filled with cloudy gray smoke set off by a smoke bomb that the intruder must have brought, making it hard to see anything that’s in front of him.

It was in this moment that Jihoon realizes he doesn’t have a weapon on him. He’s violently tackled down, his head crashing against the floor with a loud thump. Jihoon tries his best to fight him off but the intruder is twice as large as him and before he knows it, he’s staring into the barrel of a blaster.

“Jihoon!” he hears Soonyoung yell. Soonyoung is a second faster and shoots the blaster out of the man’s hand before he throws his own at Jihoon who catches it with ease. Jihoon shoots the man, hitting him square in the shoulder. He scrambles back up on his feet and Soonyoung makes his way to stand beside him, a dagger somehow materializing in his hands.

The masked man gets ready to strike again, but freezes in place when the sound of heavy footfalls come nearer and nearer.

“What’s going —” Seungcheol starts, appearing around the corner followed closely by Junhui, Minghao and lastly Chan. He’s cut off by a blaster firing at and barely missing him. He reaches for his weapon to shoot back but Junhui’s quicker; he aims and fires his pulse pistols at the intruder, who by now had probably realized that he’s greatly outnumbered. He sprints off to the window at the end of the wall and crashes through it, sending broken glass flying in all different directions. Jihoon chases him and sticks his head out the damaged window, but all he could see are trees and a thick darkness.

“He’s gone,” Jihoon says to the group. He could still feel the adrenaline rushing through his veins as he tries to catch his breath.

“Who was that?” Minghao asks, eyebrows furrowed. Soonyoung shrugs.

Jihoon didn’t expect anyone to have an answer, but Seungcheol does. “Talon,” he replies grimly.

“The terrorist organisation?” Junhui asks, astounded. “What were they doing here?”

Seungcheol sighs. “I was hoping I could tell you all later when everyone’s here, but I guess I have no choice now.” He runs a hand through his dark hair, and in this moment he looks the most tired he’s ever been. “I was attacked five days ago at the Jeju Watchpoint. I’ve been staying there for almost a year now, laying low, but I guess Talon must have found out. They’re after the list of names and last known locations of former Overwatch agents.”

“What do they want with Overwatch?” Soonyoung asks, twisting the dagger in his hands.

“I have no idea. I’ve deleted all of the files that may have contained that list. The only existing copy is in a hard drive that I’ve stored away,” Seungcheol says. “This is why I initiated a recall. If Talon’s risen up from the shadows after all these years and is acting so aggressively, they must be up to something.”

Junhui chews on his bottom lip, a bad habit of his that he hasn’t broken even after all these years, something he does when his nerves get the best of him. “They know we’re here, then. The dude in the mask must have seen all of us, right? He’ll report back to his superiors or whatever and then they’ll know that we’re up to something too, or at least they’ll have the names of four former agents.”

“I’ll have to tell Jeonghan,” Seungcheol sayys. “If he’s coming then he has the right to know it isn’t as safe here as it was five hours ago.”

The air hangs so heavy and dreary around them that it’s almost suffocating. No one had expected the breach, no one was prepared. Chan looks at him with wide eyes as if he’s begging for Jihoon to say something, to maybe find a possible solution to all of this as if the situation is a malfunctioned mech that Jihoon could fix in his sleep.

“We have to figure things out as soon as possible.” It’s Soonyoung who speaks up, glancing warily around the room as if another masked intruder would spring on them out of nowhere. “But we should get all the facts straight first. I think we should take turns keeping watch tonight, just in case.”

“Minghao and I can take the first shift,” Junhui offers. “We should stay in a group. Or at least in pairs.”

Seungcheol nods in agreement before clasping his hand on Chan’s shoulder. “Chan, can you come upstairs with me? I have to go call Jeonghan,” he says, and with that they’re gone in an instant. Junhui and Minghao leave too to scout the area, which leaves Jihoon with Soonyoung.

Silence settles between the cracks again; it’s like both of them forget how to breathe or move whenever they’re alone. Soonyoung is looking at him, gaze resting on his face before it wanders down to his hands, at which then he says, “You’re bleeding.”

Jihoon blinks. “What?”

“You’re bleeding,” Soonyoung repeats, taking three long strides toward Jihoon to close the gap between them. He takes Jihoon’s hands in his, and when Jihoon looks down sure enough there’s a gash on his right palm and minor scratches on his left. He didn’t even realize he was injured. It must have been from when he was shielding himself from the broken glass. There are small cuts on his fingers too; he moves them and flinches when they start to sting.

“Ow,” he hisses, staring down at the cuts. He always hated it when his hands were the ones that got injured because in his line of work his hands are his most essential weapons -- without them he’s practically useless.

“I think I saw an old first aid kit stashed away somewhere in the kitchen,” Soonyoung says before grabbing Jihoon by the wrists and dragging him out of the hall. The grip he has on Jihoon isn’t bone crushingly tight, but it isn’t so relaxed either; Jihoon could slip away if he wanted, but Soonyoung holds him with a purpose, holds him like he’s going to disappear if he lets go.

(And to be frank, Jihoon isn’t entirely sure that he even wants Soonyoung to let go.)

Soonyoung makes Jihoon wash his hands under running water and sits him on one of the rickety chairs by the kitchen table before he goes in search of the first aid kit which he finds moments later in one of the cabinets. Jihoon wonders briefly how he knew it was there -- maybe he had taken a look around the Watchpoint before Jihoon’s arrival, had wanted to see if anything had changed or if everything stayed exactly the same as when they left it five years ago.

Soonyoung sets the kit down on the dusty table and pops the lid open. “Out,” he orders Jihoon, motioning for his hands. Jihoon didn’t even think twice about it and extends them palms up towards Soonyoung, and again he’s stricken by how natural it feels to just be around him. Sure it’s awkward as hell when they’re both completely aware of each other’s presence but when it comes to things like fighting side by side or patching each other up after, it’s like they both run on muscle memory alone. It’s like their bodies remember what they used to have, even if their minds don’t want to.

Soonyoung checks the label on the bottle of iodine spray and after deeming it still safe to use, he says, “This is going to sting a bit.”

Jihoon winces when Soonyoung sprays the iodine onto his palms, fighting back the urge to ball his hands into fists. Once he’s done, Soonyoung takes the roll of gauze out of the first aid kit and gently winds it around Jihoon’s left hand. He works slowly and carefully, making sure that he doesn’t jostle Jihoon’s hand unnecessarily, tongue poking out in concentration.

The end product is a bit messy and Jihoon tried his best to fight back a laugh. Soonyoung looks at him, puzzled. “What? What did I do?”

“You’re still so bad at this,” Jihoon answers. “It’s been five years and you haven’t improved?”

“You were always better at all this first aid shit,” Soonyoung pouts, “and that’s because you got plenty of practice on me.”

“You were always so clumsy and reckless,” Jihoon says, and he’s smiling despite of himself. He rests his left hand on his lap and brings his right one closer to Soonyoung. “I’m surprised I didn’t have to perform emergency surgery on you with all the times you got injured.”

“You almost did though, remember? That time in —”

“In France. Yeah, I remember,” Jihoon says. His eyes follow the movement of Soonyoung’s slender fingers as they wrap the gauze around Jihoon’s right hand. “You -- God, you had no idea how scared I was.”

The incident in France is easily one of the most terrifying things Jihoon’s gone through. It was supposed to be a quick evacuation mission but they were ambushed along the way, so sudden and so unexpectedly that none of them had much time to react. The team was seperated and Soonyoung had bore the brunt of the attack. Jihoon had taken care of injuries before, but Soonyoung’s were so bad that he didn’t know what to do. Jeonghan had found them just in time and Jihoon had never been more grateful for him than in that moment.

Jihoon had never said it out loud, but he was sure he was going to lose Soonyoung that day. He reckoned Soonyoung knew though, because after that incident it felt as if Soonyoung had become more reluctant to leave his side, afraid that if he does he might never come back.

“I’m sorry,” Soonyoung says, passing the gauze one last time around Jihoon’s hand before sticking medical tape on it to keep it secure. He wipes his hands on his sweatpants, eyes flitting up to meet Jihoon’s. “For scaring you. For everything.”

Jihoon sighs as he realizes where the conversation is heading to, but he figures it’s better to clear things up as soon as possible. “It’s alright. You don’t have to be. I never blamed you. I was never angry at you.”

“Don’t lie to make me feel better,” Soonyoung says, and again it takes Jihoon aback how easily they could read each other.

“I’m not,” Jihoon sighs again. “Okay, maybe I was a bit angry at you at the beginning. But only at the beginning. I didn’t carry any negative sentiment towards you for the past five years.” _How could I_ , Jihoon wanted to say, _when I’m still so terribly in love with you?_

Soonyoung clenches his fists. “For the past five years I’ve done nothing but berate myself for being such a coward. If I had never left…” he swallows, his voice turns into something much softer, “...I would have never lost you.”

 

////

 

(   “You’re leaving?”

Soonyoung nods. He takes Jihoon’s hand in his -- they’re warm. Always so warm. “Yes. And I want you to come with me.”

“Why?” Jihoon asks, feeling something akin to betrayal settle into the pit of his stomach.

“They’re shutting Overwatch down. It’s their final decision. There’s nothing we can do, Jihoon.”

“So you’re just going to walk away? Leave me behind?” Jihoon’s voice trembles. “Leave _us_ behind?”

“That’s why I’m asking you to please come with me, Jihoon. There’s nothing for us in Overwatch anymore,” Soonyoung squeezes his hand, looks pleadingly into his eyes. “We can build a new life out there together. Please, Jihoon.”

“This isn’t even about our relationship anymore, Soonyoung!” Jihoon yells. “It’s about Mingyu and Joshua and Seungcheol and everybody else! It’s about our friends, our family, the people who need us! The greater good!”

“It’s no use to stay and fight for something that already has one foot in its grave!”

Jihoon wrestles free out of Soonyoung’s grip. “I can’t believe you’re such a coward that you won’t even stay and _try_.”

Soonyoung’s eyes narrow; he looks angrier than Jihoon’s ever seen him in years. “At least I’m not foolish enough to believe that I can actually make a difference.”

Soonyoung turns away from him, and suddenly Jihoon feels the absence of his warmth. He reaches for the doorknob. Jihoon breathes in shakily.

“Soonyoung, if you walk out that door,” Jihoon starts, trembling, feels the pressure descend upon on his ribs, “we’re done.”

Soonyoung doesn’t even look back.   )

 

////

 

The next day Jihoon wakes up feeling like utter shit. His whole body aches and his hands sting but he’s been through worse. He manages to crawl out of his blanket and head towards the kitchen where Minghao is cooking something up in a giant silver pot.

Minghao glances at him, smiling. “Oh, good. You’re awake. Could you help me with the --” his eyes fall on Jihoon’s bandaged hands, “nevermind. You just sit down, I’ll be done in a few.”

“Sorry,” Jihoon smiles apologetically at him. “If I weren’t injured I still don’t think I’ll be much help either. Somehow I always manage to mess everything up when it comes to cooking.”

“I’m making instant ramen,” Minghao says. “You can’t mess up instant ramen. It’s nearly impossible.”

Jihoon snorts. “Tell that to Soonyoung,” he murmurs to himself as he remembers the time Soonyoung managed to burn a pot of instant ramen.

He doesn’t expect Minghao to hear him, but he does; Minghao laughs, says, “You’re right. I don’t trust him with anything that involves a knife and a stove. One time he almost burned my kitchen down trying to boil water.”

“That sounds like him alright,” Jihoon says, settling down into a chair by the dining table. He watches Minghao turn the stove off and prepare two bowls of ramen. He sets one of them right in front of Jihoon and shoves a pair of chopsticks into his hands, “Eat.”

Jihoon thanks him, not realizing how hungry he is until he took a bite of the noodles. They eat in silence for a while; it’s not awkward -- quite the opposite, actually. Even though Jihoon’s known Minghao for barely a day, he feels completely at ease with him, like they’ve been friends for years.

Jihoon is halfway through his ramen when Minghao finally breaks the silence and says, “So. You and Soonyoung go way back, right?”

Jihoon nods.

“Has he changed much?”

“Honestly, no,” Jihoon replies. “He’s still the same. Still loud and annoying.” _And lovely, and starry-eyed, and a hurricane of heartaches and pinky promises._

Minghao hums. He’s finished his ramen, sets his chopsticks gingerly on top of the bowl. “He said the same about you to Jun, actually.”

“He called me loud and annoying?”

Minghao chuckles. “No, I meant he said that you didn’t change much too. But I think after five years, that’s a bit hard to believe. People change. They grow.” A few beats of silence before Minghao speaks again, “I… I know this isn’t my place to bring this up, but Soonyoung really misses you, you know.”

Jihoon lifts his head so that he’s looking directly at Minghao. “I’m sure he misses everyone. Seungcheol, Jeonghan, Mingyu --”

“It’s different. It’s always different with you,” says Minghao tentatively.

“What makes you say that?”

“He doesn’t talk about you the same way he does when he talks about the others. I don’t know how to explain it. It’s like… he’s suddenly so full of ache and tenderness that I never knew existed within him.”

Jihoon stays silent. Doesn’t know what to say, didn’t expect such a truthful answer from Minghao.

“Call me a hopeless romantic, but I think… I think the two of you haven’t changed much because it’s almost like you’re both waiting to meet again,” Minghao says softly. “Like you just want to pick up where you left off.”

 

////

 

(   The infirmary is white. Too white. Too blinding. It makes Jihoon sick.

Soonyoung lies in one of the beds, hooked up to strange machines that fills the quiet room with their rhythmic beeping. He’s pale -- too pale. He doesn’t look like the Soonyoung that’s usually so full of life and laughter. Jihoon thinks that this image will haunt him forever.

Jeonghan had reassured him that Soonyoung’s in a stable condition, that he’s going to be okay, but it still didn’t stop Jihoon from practically moving into the infirmary, waiting for Soonyoung to wake up.

 _Wake up, Soonyoung. Please. Wake up._ It’s practically a mantra that Jihoon’s been chanting every damn day.

The incident in France had taken a toll on everyone -- not only physically but mentally as well. It’s one of the worst attacks to have ever happened in Overwatch’s history. They’re more than lucky to not have suffered any fatalities.

When Soonyoung finally wakes up, it’s five days later, and Jihoon doesn’t stop crying for a full hour. Soonyoung holds him tighter than ever. Soonyoung holds him like he doesn’t plan on ever letting go.   )

 

////

 

A crash comes from the library just as Jihoon walks past it, causing him to jump. He stands still, pressing his ear against the doors to listen for any more noises coming from inside; he could make out the shuffling of books, someone cursing under their breath.

Jihoon barges in, half-expecting to see another masked intruder inside but all he found is Soonyoung, kneeling as he struggles to pick up a stack of books that had fallen from one of the shelves.

“Soonyoung? What are you doing here?” he asks. Soonyoung looks up at him, embarrassed as if he had just been caught doing something he shouldn’t.

“Didn’t mean to make such a ruckus,” he says, a couple of thick books in his hands, pressed against his chest as he makes his way to the barren shelf. He places them in one by one, arranges them as neatly as possible.

Jihoon bends down to pick up the rest of the fallen books, dust coating his fingers. “You didn’t answer my question,” he says as he approaches Soonyoung. He stands right beside him, was about to shelve the books when something catches his eye.

“Oh,” he breathes out.

On the back of the shelf, engraved haphazardly in the wood is _LJH + KSY_. A heart surrounds the letters, sharp and wobbly. Jihoon feels his chest tighten. The dust starts to sink into his lungs.

“Yeah. I wanted to see if it’s still there,” Soonyoung scratches the back of his ear; he isn’t looking at Jihoon. “I didn’t know what I was expecting, really. Of course it is. No one’s been in here for years, and we’re probably the only ones who know that that exists.”

Jihoon sets the books down horizontally on the shelf. “It’s so… so weird seeing this again.”

“Why?”

“I don’t know,” replies Jihoon. He runs his fingers against the carving, feels every bump and scratch and sharp turn. “It feels like a lifetime ago.”

Soonyoung hums, inches closer towards him, stares at the carved letters too. “Everything was so much easier back then.”

“It was.” _Because I had you by my side._

Silence settles between them, buries itself deep within the cracks on the walls and the crevices of their skin. Jihoon turns around, finds Soonyoung looking back at him.

“Listen, Jihoon,” Soonyoung sighs, running his hand through his dark hair. “I don’t know how much time we have left here. I don’t know when we’ll meet again, but I do know that if I don’t tell you this now I won’t be able to live with myself.”

Jihoon swallows. Soonyoung continues, voice as soft as the gossamer between the cracks in the ceiling; so soft that it makes Jihoon ache.

“I know I’ve hurt you and not only betrayed your trust but also Seungcheol’s and the rest of the team’s. I shouldn’t have walked out those doors five years ago. I shouldn’t have been such a coward.

I missed you so much. When I saw you walk enter the conference room I thought I was seeing a ghost; I couldn’t believe that the universe forgave me enough that it led me right back to you. I understand if you don’t have trust in me anymore, I understand if you say you don’t want anything to do with me ever again, but when we fought together side by side last night it reminded me of the old days. It reminded me of how much I loved you, and how much I still do.”

There’s something terribly tender in Soonyoung’s voice, something that makes Jihoon’s heart break and mend itself at the same time. Soonyoung’s eyes glimmer with what Jihoon would like to think is hope; wishful thinking; a light that never turns off.

Jihoon inhales through his nose, exhales out his mouth. “What do you want me to say, Soonyoung?”

Soonyoung looks him right in the eyes. “Tell me to stop hoping. Tell me to move on.” He swallows. “Tell me you don’t love me anymore.” He speaks it out like like a plea; or a prayer to some god.

But Jihoon isn’t a god. He can’t give Soonyoung what he wants, especially not if it isn’t true.

 

////

 

(   Soonyoung’s lips are wet and warm, attached to the base of Jihoon’s neck. Jihoon groans when his warm hands slip underneath his shirt, tracing circles on the soft skin of his abdomen, before making their way slowly down to play with the waistband of Jihoon’s underwear.

“You,” Jihoon breathes out shakily, “are going to be the death of me, Kwon Soonyoung.”

“You’re beautiful,” Soonyoung says, his long fingers finally undoing Jihoon’s belt.

Jihoon hums, tugs lightly on Soonyoung’s hair to make him lean down so he could give him a sloppy kiss. “You’re not so bad yourself.”   )

 

 

////

 

Chan barges into the room in a flurry of limbs, startling Jihoon from where he’s lying on the ground trying to fall asleep, trying to forget Soonyoung’s pleading eyes and trembling voice.

_Tell me you don’t love me anymore._

Chan looms over him, grinning from ear to ear, exclaims excitedly, “He’s here!”

Jihoon opens one eye and sits up. “Who’s here?”

“Yoon Jeonghan!” Chan answers, practically jumping up and down. He gestures for Jihoon to stand up. “Come on, hyung! We have to meet him!”

Jihoon groans and follows Chan out the door (not that he was going to fall asleep anyway), amused at how excited Chan is. He knows Chan’s a fan of Jeonghan and his work, but he didn’t know he was _this_ big of a fan. The boy rushes down the stairs before coming to an abrupt halt in the middle of the hall, looking up at none other than Yoon Jeonghan.

Jeonghan’s signature dark flowing hair is now chopped short and bleached blond; Jihoon wouldn’t have recognized him if he hadn’t turned around the moment Jihoon reached the landing of the stairs, eyes widening as they fall on him.

“Jihoon!” Jeonghan’s grin is wide and bright, lighting up his beautiful face. He fully faces him, ending the conversation he was having with Seungcheol as he approaches Jihoon to give him a quick hug. “You’re here! No one told me!”

“It’s good to see you, Jeonghan,” Jihoon grins back. “You changed your hair.”

Jeonghan runs his hands through his locks almost immediately, as if it’s his reflex to do so when someone mentions his hair. “I was getting bored of it. And it’s easier to maintain now out on the frontlines.”

“It suits you.”

“Thank you, I know,” Jeonghan replies. Jihoon laughs; he’s still the same confident and funny Jeonghan and it’s relieving to find out that the frontlines hadn’t changed him much. Jeonghan then turns towards Chan, who’s been watching the exchange in nervous silence. “And who’s this? Your boyfriend?”

“God, _no_ ,” Jihoon says, cringing. “That’s Chan. We work together at MEKA.”

Jeonghan makes a long ‘ah’ sound. “The young pilot, right?”

“Y-Yes!” Chan says. He bows quickly and politely. “I’m Lee Chan. It’s an honour to meet you Mr.Yoon! I’m a big fan of your work!”

“The _biggest_ ,” Jihoon adds on. “It was impossible to get him to shut up when you upgraded your Valkyrie Suit.”

Jeonghan chuckles. “Oh, is that so? If you have any questions about it, feel free to ask me. I’d be happy to answer.”

Chan looks like he’s about to pass out; he swallows thickly, “Ah, yes, sir!”

“Since you’ve been reacquainted with Jihoon now, I think it’s best if we brief you and everyone else on the current situation,” Seungcheol says. “Soonyoung, Jun and Minghao should already be in the conference room.”

“Ah, Soonyoung’s here too?” Jeonghan asks.

“He was the first to respond, actually,” replies Seungcheol as he starts to lead the way towards the conference room.

Jeonghan hums; he glances at Jihoon and even though it was quick -- barely a second -- Jihoon still caught it, could feel the weight of it. “That’s surprising.”

 

////

 

(   “I go away on a mission for two weeks and come back to find out that our Jihoonie finally discovers he has feelings? My, what has that Kwon Soonyoung done to you.”

Jihoon rolls his eyes. “Nice to see you again too, Jeonghan.”

Jeonghan grins at him, leaning against a glass cabinet full of prototype gadgets that Jihoon’s been working on. “Tell me, how many blasters did Soonyoung use to melt that ice around your heart?”

“Ha ha, very funny,” Jihoon deadpans. He points at Jeonghan with his screwdriver. “You can leave my lab if you’re done harassing me.”

Jeonghan lifts his hands in defence. “Just wanted to congratulate you. You two are cute together. It took you long enough.”

“Why does everybody say that,” Jihoon mutters.

Jeonghan laughs. “Be careful, though. With a face like that, he’s bound to have broken a heart or two.”   )

////

 

Seungcheol briefs them about the situation quickly yet concisely, careful to not miss out any minor details from the start to the end. Everything’s suddenly so tense and serious again, the air in the room growing heavier as each second passes.

“So,” Junhui’s the first to speak after Seungcheol’s finished talking, “what’s our next move? What do we do now?”

Seungcheol sighs. “What I’ll be asking from you might be too much, and I’ll understand completely if you say you want to walk away. But I initiated this recall for one reason: to bring Overwatch back together. I’m not hoping to build it back to its former glory -- even I know that’s impossible, but all I hope for right now is the safety of our former agents. I don’t plan it to be a permanent thing. We stay together at least until this whole thing blows over and Talon goes back into hiding.” He pauses, takes a breath. “What do you say?”

“I’m in,” Soonyoung answers without missing a beat. Jihoon turns to look at him so quickly that he’s sure he got whiplash. Determination is written all over Soonyoung’s face, sunk deeply into the wrinkle between his eyebrows.

Junhui and Minghao exchange a look before Junhui nods and says, “Us too.”

“I guess it won’t hurt,” Jeonghan says, grinning as he leans back into his seat. “The frontlines were getting a bit too much for me anyways, and I do miss Overwatch. Count me in as well. Maybe I can convince Joshua to come back…”

All too suddenly, six pairs of eyes direct their attention towards Jihoon, their gazes almost palpable. “I…” Jihoon shifts in his seat. “I can’t.”

It feels as if all the air has left the room. Everyone stares at him in different stages of shock; understandable, since the person who had worked the hardest to save Overwatch next to Seungcheol was Jihoon.

To see the Jihoon who had marched into the UN director’s office alongside Seungcheol to fight for Overwatch’s survival, the Jihoon who spent sleepless nights searching for a loophole, the Jihoon who lost a lover because of his devotion to the organization, five years later, turn down the offer to rebuild Overwatch is almost unbelievable.

Soonyoung breaks the silence. “Why?”

“If I join you, I’ll have to leave MEKA. If I don’t leave, if I do it in secret and people find out, I’ll be thrown into prison. It’s not only my job and entire life on the line here, but Chan’s too,” Jihoon answers, not looking at anyone in particular. “I hope you understand.”

Soonyoung opens his mouth to reply but is beaten to it by Seungcheol. “We do. It’s alright, Jihoon.”

This time, Jihoon’s eyes find Soonyoung’s when he says, “I’m sorry.”

 

////

 

(   The first ever serious fight Soonyoung and Jihoon ever had was over something so insignificant that if you were to ask either of them they wouldn’t be able to tell you what it was about. It was mostly caused by stress and overworking themselves to the brink of exhaustion than anything else and it lasted over the course of a week.

They would ignore each other’s presence and would actively avoid one another. The two of them were hard-headed, neither of them wanting to be the first to step down and admit they were wrong. It was so bad that the rest of the team weren’t sure what they were supposed to do, not wanting to act in fear of making things worse between Jihoon and Soonyoung.

It was torturous for Jihoon, because Soonyoung was _right there_ , but his pride and ego just wouldn’t let him go up to Soonyoung and apologize for whatever he did. He was able to see him, to walk right beside him, but not interact with him as if there was an invisible wall between them.

Jihoon had wondered briefly if this is what it will be like to fall out of love with Soonyoung. He never wanted to think about it ever again.

It took getting locked in a storage room, one screaming match and eight minutes of crying for them to finally sort things out. They walked out that dusty room a stronger couple with a better understanding of each other, and thankfully for the course of their relationship they had never fought as bad ever again.

Those seven days without Soonyoung was the longest week in Jihoon’s life. Jihoon would never admit it out loud, but he would rather die than relive those days over again.   )

 

////

 

Soonyoung catches him outside the conference room, grabs onto his wrist so he can’t get away. “Why?”

Jihoon looks at the hand encircled around his wrist before snapping his eyes back up at Soonyoung. “Why what?”

“Why aren’t you staying?”

“I told you already, Soonyoung. I can’t risk it,” Jihoon sighs. “I wouldn’t mind if the consequences were to fall only onto me, but I’ve dragged Chan into this as well, and I don’t want him to get into any trouble.”

Soonyoung’s eyebrows furrow, his mouth drawn into a thin line. “That’s _bullshit._ You and I know that you’re skilled enough to flawlessly cover your tracks if you wanted to. And why do you suddenly care about other people so much?”

His words pierce through Jihoon like a dagger. The implication that Jihoon didn’t care about Overwatch and the team and Chan before today makes him seethe.

“Why do I suddenly care? _Why do I suddenly care?!_ Look into the goddamn mirror!” Jihoon yells, anger rushing through his veins. He yanks his wrist out of Soonyoung’s grip, glaring at him. “Last time I checked, I was the one who stayed and fought for Overwatch and for the greater good! According to you, I was a fucking idiot -- I was _wrong_ for even trying! And now you’re berating me because I’m _not?_ ”

Soonyoung’s voice turns quiet, “I never said that.”

Jihoon scoffs. “You might as well have! You practically gave me a big ‘fuck you’ when you left! You walked away so, so easily Soonyoung, and it hurt so fucking much. I could barely hold myself together but I was still out there fighting for the team and for this fucking organization.” He feels his anger turn into tears, clouding his vision. “Why are you suddenly giving a fuck about Overwatch? You’re five years too late.”

“Because I don’t want to make the same mistake twice! I don’t want to lose the team.” Soonyoung looks sincere and helpless and the ache in Jihoon’s heart is back again, all too familiar; something only Soonyoung could cause. “I don’t want to lose _you_ again, Jihoon.”

Jihoon swallows. The words are as heavy as lead in his tongue; he uses all the strength left he has in his entire body to get them out. “I’m sorry, Soonyoung. I’m leaving tomorrow.”

 

////

 

(   “Do you think this will work?”

Jihoon lifts his head and catches Seungcheol’s eyes from across the table. Between the two of them lies a mountain of files and paperwork and empty mugs of coffee. They’ve been awake for a little over thirty-eight hours, desperately trying to find a solution to stop the implementation of the PETRAS act. In the past two days, Seungcheol had done tons of interviews and given out statements to various media in hopes that they could rally more people to fight for Overwatch. In the next three hours, he’s scheduled to do two more interviews with local TV stations.

“What other choice do we have?” Jihoon replies, rubbing at his eyes. The image of Soonyoung walking away from him flashes briefly in his mind. “It _has_ to work.”   )

 

////

 

Chan’s already half-asleep when Jihoon enters their room at almost two in the morning. He rouses just as Jihoon’s tip-toeing around his body. “Hyung?”

“Oh, sorry, did I wake you?”

“What time is it?” Chan asks. He doesn’t give Jihoon a chance to answer and checks the clock on his phone himself. “What were you doing? It’s late.”

“I was up on the observation deck. Just... thinking,” replies Jihoon. He slips under his covers as quietly as he could which was a bit redundant since Chan is already awake anyways.

“What were you thinking about?”

“Go back to sleep, Chan.”

A beat of silence. “Were you thinking about Soonyoung-hyung?”

“ _Chan_ ,” Jihoon warns.

“You were, weren’t you?”

Jihoon shuts his eyes as if doing so would make Chan disappear or at the very least stop asking questions. “I don’t want to talk about it right now. Go to sleep.”

“Then _when_ do you want to talk about it?” Chan demands. “ _Never?_ ”

“Chan --”

“We’ve been working together for almost two years now hyung, and this is the first time I’ve ever found out something about your past. You’re always so cold and guarded when it comes to things like this. No matter how hard I try to get you to open up you never do, and I can see that you’re hurting,” Chan says, so quiet and earnest that it fills Jihoon with immense guilt. It’s not like he doesn’t want to tell Chan; it’s more like he’s never able to find the right time and words to do so. “So let me _help_ , hyung.”

“You want to know what’s going on?” Jihoon sits up, throws the blankets off of his legs in frustration. “What’s going on is that I’m seeing my ex-boyfriend for the first time in five years. Someone who left me because he didn’t want to fight back then. And now he suddenly thinks I’m the bad guy for not wanting to stay and risk everything you and I have worked so hard for.”

“And why do you care so much about what he thinks?” Chan asks, unusually level-headed. “You’re usually not one to give a fuck about what other people perceive of you.”

“I don’t -- I -- Ugh! I don’t know!” Jihoon groans, burying his face into his hands. Chan’s got him there; he’s observant and it’s no surprise that he’s able to ask Jihoon questions that Jihoon wouldn’t normally ask himself.

"I know that you want to stay, hyung. But you keep telling yourself you don't, because it's against the law or some shit, and that if people ever find out you could get me in trouble,” Chan says. “I'll be fine, hyung. You and I know damn well what you're actually afraid of. Stop running from whatever it is you're running from.”

“How could I,” Jihoon starts, trying to keep his voice as steady as possible, “when that’s all I’ve been doing for the past five years?”

“I know that you’re scared of getting hurt again, hyung,” Chan says, and it’s scary how spot-on he is. “But I think… I think you still care so much about Soonyoung-hyung, and that should be enough to outweigh your fears. I’m sure Soonyoung-hyung’s learned his lesson. He’s going to think twice before ever messing with you again.” Jihoon laughs at this even though his eyes were beginning to sting from unshed tears. Chan cracks a smile, reaches over to pat Jihoon’s hand gently. “It’s all up to you, hyung, whether you want to take that jump or not.”

 

////

 

(   Soonyoung’s bed barely fits the two of them, but they make it work. Ever since they started dating, Jihoon finds himself spending more time in Soonyoung’s room and less in his own. It’s come to the point that he has his own drawer in Soonyoung’s dresser filled with his clothes and toiletries.

It’s awfully domestic. Thinking about it makes Jihoon’s heart ache in the best way possible.

“Do you think,” Jihoon asks one night, curled up against Soonyoung, his head resting in the crook between Soonyoung’s neck and shoulder, “that we could have a life outside of Overwatch? Together?”

Soonyoung’s quiet for a moment. “You’re strangely sentimental tonight. Was it because of the movie we watched? Did _Pride and Prejudice_ make you all mushy?”

Jihoon pinches Soonyoung’s arm, earning him a yelp. “Answer the question.”

Soonyoung’s quiet again, like he’s trying to think of the right words to say. Finally, he answers, “I hope we can. I mean, I want to. I really do.”

Jihoon lifts his head so that he’s looking at Soonyoung before saying with the utmost seriousness in his voice, “Then let’s do it.”

Soonyoung gapes at him. “Are you asking me to _run away with you?_ ”

Jihoon pinches his arm again. “No, idiot. I’m asking you to have a life with me after Overwatch. After this war is over, when the world doesn’t need us anymore and we’re able to retire and live in a farm in the countryside with three cats and four goats.” He extends his pinky and wiggles it in front of Soonyoung’s face. “I’m asking you to grow old with me.”

Soonyoung kind of looks like he’s about to start sobbing any minute. “It would be a privilege to live the rest of my days with you, Lee Jihoon.” He smiles, bright and watery, and hooks his own pinky with Jihoon’s.   )

 

////

 

When he knocked on the door, Jihoon wasn’t expecting anyone to answer. It is three in the morning after all, and if someone were to answer he definitely wasn’t expecting it to be Junhui.

But there he stands in front of him clad in a thin black shirt and checkered boxers, rubbing his eyes as they adjust to the dim lights in the hallway.

“Jihoon?” Junhui yawns. “Why are you here?” He suddenly becomes much more alert. “Did something happen?”

“Nothing happened, don’t worry,” Jihoon says, earning a relieved sigh from Junhui. He tries to peek past the man’s shoulder and into the room, but all he could see was darkness. “Is, uh, Soonyoung in there?”

Junhui blinks. “Yeah, he is. He’s asleep, actually. But I could go wake him if you want…?” His voice trails off, unsure.

“Ah, no, it’s fine. Don’t sweat it. I was just…” Jihoon pauses once he’s realised what he was doing. _Running away._ It’s always been something so second nature to him. Especially when it comes to his own emotions.

Especially when it comes to Soonyoung.

Chan’s voice rings in his head. _It’s all up to you, hyung, whether you want to take that jump or not._

“Actually, can you please wake him and tell him to come find me in around ten minutes?” Jihoon says.

Junhui tilts his head to the side questioningly but he doesn’t say anything. Just nods. Jihoon offers him a smile. “Great. Thank you. I’ll be up at the observation deck.”

 

////

(   Jihoon’s backpack is heavy on his shoulders, but the knowledge that he had failed Overwatch and the team is much, much heavier.

“I guess this is it then,” Seungcheol says, voice tinged with sadness and something else Jihoon can’t quite pinpoint. Regret, maybe.

“I guess it is,” Jihoon sighs. “Such a shame that even after everything we’ve done, we still failed.”

Seungcheol smiles, but it’s sad and tired. “We did our best. Sometimes it’s just not enough.”

“Where are you going to go now?” Jihoon asks him. It’s not like any of them had to think about backup plans when they all believed that Overwatch was going to stand for a long, long time.

“I’m not sure yet,” Seungcheol shrugs, “but I think I’ll head to Beijing. A change of scenery might be good for me.” He pauses, hesitant. “How about you? Think you’ll reconnect with Soon --”

Jihoon shakes his head, cutting him off. “No. I don’t want to see him ever again.”   )

 

////

 

The elevator behind him dings, its doors sliding open with a loud creak from the years of unuse. Jihoon turns around and leans back against the metal railings, catches Soonyoung’s eyes from across the deck.

Just a few hours ago, he was up here alone trying to cool down from the confrontation he had with Soonyoung, a hundred percent sure that he would be leaving Hakone first thing in the morning as if staying any longer would kill him.

He should have left as soon as Seungcheol’s briefing ended, because now he’s actually considering doing something he would never even allow himself to think about six hours earlier.

Soonyoung’s voice is unsure when he speaks, carried by the cold mountain winds. “Hi. Junhui said you wanted to talk to me.”

Jihoon nods. “Yeah. Thanks for coming.” He shivers as another gust of wind blows past him, very much regretting not bringing his hoodie with him.

“Are you cold? Here, use this,” Soonyoung says. Jihoon’s about to retort but Soonyoung’s already taking off his jacket and draping it over Jihoon’s shoulder. It’s not the warmest thing in the world, but it’s better than nothing.

“Thank you,” Jihoon says, already feeling his face starting to heat up. He hugs the jacket closer to his body; it smells like Soonyoung — pine and mint and blueberry candies.

Soonyoung hums and leans forward against the railings. “So, what was it that you wanted to talk to me about?”

Jihoon turn around so that he’s mimicking Soonyoung’s position. From way up here, he could see the lush forest spanning miles across the mountainside. Back when the Hakone Watchpoint was still in use, the observatory deck was used as both a security measure and research space. Astronomers would frequent the place because of its fantastic view of the sky -- clear and void of any light pollution. Jihoon remembers all the times when Soonyoung would bribe the guards with snacks so they could leave them alone to watch the stars for a few minutes.

“I just… wanted to apologize for yelling at you earlier,” Jihoon says. “That wasn’t very nice of me.”

“I’m sorry too,” Soonyoung apologizes. “The things I said… I didn’t mean any of them. I just got too caught up in my emotions. It was a very asshole move.”

“You’re damn right it was,” Jihoon says without bite. He cracks a small smile. “I can’t believe you’ve broken my heart _twice_.”

Soonyoung snorts. “Can’t believe you would even let me.”

They’re quiet for a moment, and Jihoon’s extremely aware of Soonyoung’s breathing right beside him. In a place that’s so peaceful and still, it’s a bit hard to ignore. Jihoon swallows down the lump in his throat; it’s time to get speak before he runs away again.

“Soonyoung, I --”

“Listen --”

They stare at each other, silent as they both wait to listen to what the other has to say, but no one speaks up first.

“You go,” Jihoon urges Soonyoung to talk, trying to buy himself some time to calm his nerves.

Soonyoung sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “I know nothing I can say will change your mind about staying. I respect your decision. But I need to know this one thing before you leave. The other day, you never told me how you felt.” He squeezes his eyes shut and takes a deep breath. “Please put me out of my misery. Tell me to move on. It’s your turn to break my heart, Lee Jihoon.”

Jihoon stares at him. “What makes you so sure that I want to break your heart?”

“Why wouldn’t you?” Soonyoung answers.

Jihoon rolls his eyes. It seems as if his body moved by itself, controlled by invisible strings, because the next thing he knew was that he was standing on the tip of his toes and kissing Soonyoung.

It’s just a peck on the lips that barely lasted a second, but it’s still a kiss nonetheless. Soonyoung’s eyes snap open in shock, his jaw hanging open.

“Does that answer your question?” Jihoon asks.

“No?” Soonyoung answers frantically. “It absolutely does not! All it did is make me more even confused!”

“Then you’re a still an idiot.” Jihoon’s voice becomes considerably softer when he says, “I’m still in love with you, you asshole. I don’t think there was a time where I wasn’t.”

Soonyoung stares at Jihoon in disbelief, as if Jihoon had just spoken an entire sentence in Russian. “I… I was so sure that you despised me.”

“Oh, don’t get me wrong, I do. I hated you for leaving,” Jihoon says, “but my love for you outweighs that.”

Soonyoung looks at him like he’s about to cry. “I really don’t deserve you.”

Jihoon punches him in the arm. “You absolutely don’t, you jerk.”

Soonyoung rubs at the spot where Jihoon’s fist collided against his flesh. “I deserved _that_ , though.”

“I think the reason I was so afraid of coming here isn’t because I was scared I would see you again. I was scared that you’d _hurt_ me all over again,” Jihoon confesses.

“I would never want to hurt you that badly ever again. I regret walking out that day. If I had the power to turn back time, I would deck past me in the face and beat him to a pulp.”

Jihoon laughs. “I trust you.” When he meets Soonyoung’s eyes, he smiles fondly and takes his hand in his, something he thought he would never be able to do again. Soonyoung’s fingers are calloused, his skin warm. “Besides, we promised each other, didn’t we?”

“The three cats and five goats?”

“It believe it was four, but that works too.”

Soonyoung smiles back at him, all starlight and monsoons and love. So much love that it makes Jihoon’s heart swell twice its size. “So, you’re staying?”

“If I want to make that farm a reality, I don’t have a choice, do I?” Jihoon answers. Maybe Minghao was right. Maybe the they were meant to pick up where they left off.

Soonyoung laughs before leaning down slowly and hesitantly, like he’s about to kiss Jihoon but is too scared to. Jihoon rolls his eyes and pulls him down by the collar of his shirt and kisses him. He wraps his arms around Soonyoung’s neck when the taller man pulls him closer; Soonyoung’s breath tastes like mint, his lips warm and soft where they slot so perfectly between Jihoon’s own, as if they were always meant to be there.

Jihoon had finally stopped running away. His final destination, he thinks now, had always been Soonyoung.

Jihoon had taken the jump, and Soonyoung had been right there waiting to catch him.

 

////

 

(   The library is empty save for the two of them. It was nearing one in the morning, everyone already either in bed or cooped up in their labs doing their own thing. Jihoon rests his head against the wooden table, watching Soonyoung refer to a book he had placed in front of him before typing something on his laptop, the click clack of his fingers against the keyboard the only constant sound in the library. Jihoon had finished whatever he had to do almost an hour ago but he wanted to keep Soonyoung company even though Soonyoung had insisted that that he should get some rest.

“You know,” Jihoon whispers despite there only being the two of them in the entire library, “I’m getting real tired of all the wars and the Omnics and the fighting. I understand that I’m doing my part to save the world, but sometimes I wish I had a normal childhood. Went to prom and whatever. Carved my name and my first love’s on a tree in the park. Had my first kiss behind the bleachers. Got shitfaced drunk during my first college party.”

He knows that he has no right to complain -- he’s one of the luckier ones to come out of the Omnic Crisis barely unscathed, but he still mourns the loss of a normal childhood and young adulthood from time to time. It’s something that almost all of his teammates share. They were just teens who were thrown into a world of war and violence too early, forced to deal with problems even grown-ups couldn’t solve.

Jihoon had been talking mostly to himself and hadn’t been expecting Soonyoung to even be listening considering how engrossed in his work he is, so it surprises him when Soonyoung suddenly closes his laptop shut and stands up.

“Where are you going?” Jihoon asks, sitting up to take a clear look at Soonyoung. Soonyoung extends his hand and Jihoon takes it, allowing him to be lead to the back of the library where Soonyoung starts taking out books from one of the shelves.

Jihoon raises an eyebrow. “What are you doing?”

“Trying to give you a semblance of something normal,” Soonyoung answers. He pulls out his dagger from its sheath, twisting it in his hands. “I’m not your first love, and this isn’t a tree, but I think it will suffice.”

Soonyoung starts carving letters into the wood on the back of the shelf, Jihoon peering over his shoulder the entire time. When he’s done, he hands his dagger to Jihoon. “Your turn.”

Jihoon smiles and shakes his head but he takes the dagger anyways. “I can’t believe we’re doing this. This is so… childish.”

“You’re the one who wanted to experience it,” Soonyoung says. “Besides, I think it’s cute.”

“We’re going to get into so much trouble if someone finds out,” Jihoon says, giving the dagger back to Soonyoung after he’s done. Soonyoung admires their shared masterpiece, the shakily carved _LJH + KSY_ , before he decides it’s not enough and adds a heart around the letters.

“There,” he announces proudly, putting the dagger back into its sheath and wiping his hands on his pants. “That’s better.”

“That’s _cheesier_.”

“No one is going to see it anyways.”

Jihoon rolls his eyes, but he’s smiling despite himself. “You’re so annoying.”

“I am.” Soonyoung grins before bending down to give Jihoon a quick peck on the lips. “But you’re not getting rid of me that easily, Lee Jihoon.”   )

**Author's Note:**

> if you actually finished reading this... thank you...
> 
> i was very much into overwatch a few months ago. i've never played the game myself (because i have a mac !!!) but i just found the world and the characters so interesting that i fell in love. and of course, with every obsession i have, i had to make an au. 
> 
> i know i wanted to write a getting-back-together kinda thing and i thought using overwatch as a background was perfect for it. this had been sitting in my gdocs for a long time and i actually really liked it enough to not let it rot away. 
> 
> this is unbeta'ed, so please forgive me for any glaring mistakes! writing this was really fun, and i hope you enjoyed it!!! i'd love to hear your thoughts! <333  
> feel free to yell at me on [twitter](https://twitter.com/softerstorms) too!!!


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